1–10 Preparation and Communication
Learn about the laws and process of your case to understand your dispute and make real expectations.
Organize: Gather and keep all relevant legal documents, letters, and other communications.
Communicate: Keep dialogue open and clear as appropriate when discussing issues with the other party.
Set limits: Discuss guidelines for conversations, with the goal of staying focused and productive.
For the children: Be of what is best for them.
Listen Actively: Demonstrate a willingness to hear the other party’s side by actively listening.
Avoid Accusations: Present your concerns in “I” statements rather than accusing or blaming.
Document Agreements: Write down any verbal agreements so that later, there is no confusion about what was agreed upon.
Seek Neutral Ground: Hold discussions in a neutral, non-threatening environment.
Use Technology Wisely: If the discussion becomes too emotional, use email or messaging platforms.
11–20: Professional and Emotional Support
Engage a Mediator: Consider a neutral mediator to help facilitate conversations to reach agreements.
Engage a Collaborative Lawyer: A collaborative lawyer seeks amicable resolution over litigation.
Practice Patience: Resolve of family law disputes requires time and persistence.
Avoid Social Media Drama: Avoid airing grievances through social media while keeping your personal matters private.
Stay Calm Under Pressure: Learn ways to manage stress such as deep breathing or mindfulness.
Be Flexible: Be willing to compromise on less important issues to reach a broader agreement.
Consult a Therapist: A professional counselor can provide emotional support and coping strategies.
Focus on the Big Picture: Avoid getting caught up in minor disputes that don’t impact the overall outcome.
Understand the Other Party’s Needs: Try to identify and address their key concerns to foster cooperation.
Neutral Experts: Recruit financial planners, child psychologists, or similar experts to serve as neutral advisory bodies.
21–25. Problem-Solving and Long-Range Planning
Parenting Plan: Develop an in-depth parenting plan that clearly states custody arrangements, visitation rights, and other issues surrounding the children
Cooling Off: Agree on taking time apart to “cool off” before regrouping
Arbitrator: Utilize an arbitrator to have a third-party settle disputes sometimes.
Keep things in perspective: Remember that peaceful resolutions save time, money, and emotional energy for everyone involved.
Keep it child-focused: Remind yourself constantly that maintaining a healthy environment for your children is the ultimate goal.
